When I was a kid all I wanted to do when I grew up was "take a picture that could change the world"!
I always had a love for art. My dad use to pick me up from elementary school and take me to the museum. We would spend hours walking and talking about all the treasures inside! One of my parent's good friends was also an artist. I remember going to his studio and being in awe of how he captured these beautiful women and their emotions in charcoal. I sadly, can't draw to save my life haha. So, I found another way to express myself, a camera! I honestly don't even remember my first camera. As far back as I and my parents can remember I've had one in my hand. I do remember the drive to take images that made you FEEL. That a "pretty picture" was rarely my goal and instead I wanted to challenge people and their views with an image. So, I studied to become a National Geographic photo journalist. I wanted to travel and tell the stories that needed to be told. Right out of high school I enrolled into CSU's photography program. I was almost done when I lost a great love and with him a little of myself. He was a soldier who gave his life for our country and I am honored to keep him in my heart. Yet, after that loss, I couldn't handle the idea of photographing war anymore. I truly didn't know what I wanted. So, I took some time to myself. This is also when I started my self portrait depression series.
In the following years I got married to my childhood best friend, we started a family, opened a food truck and while I still kept a camera in my hands, it was just for me. Then we had to close his food truck due to my husband's health. After his surgeries he sat me down and said "It's your turn." He bought me a new camera and enrolled me back in that same program at CSU.
So, almost 10 years later I got my degree in fine art and portrait photography! Being the unhinged, ever indecisive, beautiful mess that I am, I still had no idea what niche I wanted to do though. So, naturally, I did a little of everything! I quickly found none of it gave me that feeling I was searching for though.
Then a friend wanted to do a boudoir session for her hubby!
getting married on the beach with my father-in-law holding a boom box with the cd we made the week before!
food truck days
boy mom life.
At the time I didn't realize this would be the session that changed my life!
She came in and absolutely slayed! A few days later I show her the images. As we go through them she starts to cry!! Yall, I am terrified, all I can think is that she hates them and what have I done?! Then she smiles and gives me a huge hug. As we chat she tells me that while she acts like she has tons of confidence, deep down she's never liked pictures of herself. That she could see her power and screw them being for he hubby, these were for HER now!
Watching her light up as we went through the gallery I knew I was never going back.
I had found my way to change the world, one person at a time!
one of my first self portraits
I quickly realized this was a theme. That sooooooooooo many women were terrified of their own beauty. They were ashamed of celebrating being a woman and their sexuality. I had felt that way for so long too and I wanted to help end that cycle. I started diving into boudoir focused education via seminars, posing classes, self help workshops, body dysmorphia awareness, learning about lingerie and anything else I could get my hands on. During that first year I realized, I was healing myself too!
I was embracing and honoring not just my body but my spirit.
Every self portrait made me appreciate something new about my body. Every Queen I photographed made me see just how uniquely beautiful we all are. Every tear they shed when they saw their images or the emotions as they expressed what drove them to celebrate themselves. Each of these things made my soul a little lighter too. I found, and continue to add to, my tribe.
